Impressing No One

Automakers put a lot of effort into distinguishing higher-trim models from base models, and badges are just one part of that. The BMW F80 M3 had an M3 badge on its driver’s side “kidney” grille, which was black, and which sat within a sculpted front bumper below a contoured hood. They all look wonderful together. 

But sometimes, some goobers buy these fancy badges and stick them on their base-model cars. It’s common enough to have an adage about it, and the goobers should listen up: The only people who might be impressed by those badges know enough about cars to know that yours is a fake.

The opposite of this is the sleeper (or Q-car, in the U.K.), which has all the performance of a higher-trim model but without the badges. If you understand the problematic psychology behind a person pretending to have more power than they do, or who delights in scooting along through traffic with a 500-horsepower wolf in sheep’s clothing, then you’re well on your way to understand Jesus’ lesson about fasting. 

Fasting, double tithing, taking a “digital Sabbath” (living without your phone for a day), or giving something up for Lent are all useful practices of intentional deprivation with a spiritual purpose. Some say the act itself can have a profound effect on the mind – that living without something focuses more attention on important things – while others say the deprivation is only worthwhile if it’s replaced with something intended for spiritual growth. Either way, the goal shouldn’t be praise and admiration for putting yourself through it. When people fast to get attention, their stomachs may still be empty but their hearts are filled with good feelings from the attention. The fast is purposeless. As Jesus said, “They have received their reward in full,” (Matthew 6:16) and it’s not a worthwhile reward.

On the other hand, Jesus says to fast quietly and joyfully, “so that it will not be obvious to men that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:18) It isn’t about telling someone about your fast last week, and waiting for them to say “Wow, I had no idea!” It isn’t at all about what other people think of your fast.

In this way, hiding the power of your sleeper by de-badging it has a lot in common with putting fake badges on it. As long as you’re this concerned with public opinion, something may be missing from your private relationship with God. 

If you worry about having to deceive people a little bit to please them, or you oversell your holiness to win their approval or undersell your holiness to get their sympathy, or think they wouldn’t like the real you without any faking, take a deep breath and meditate on how deeply God knows you and loves you. He made you. He knows what you struggle with. He knows the lies you’ve told other people, the fake smiles, the false “I’m fine” assurances, and the fear that they see through the whole thing. There is no deceiving God, and the more comfortable we are with that, the easier it becomes to be transparent with the people around us.

Alone with God, our prayers don’t have to be perfect. We don’t have to worry about revealing anything incriminating; he already knows. There’s no fear in what he might say when we confess our wrongs, because we already know that he rejoices when we come back to him (Luke 15:20-24).

Sometimes we’re most aware of God’s intimate knowledge of us after we sin. In the middle of David’s achingly repentant Psalm 51, he wrote, “Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.” (Psalm 51:6) Our personal relationship with God is where we honestly open up to him, and receive his wisdom in that same openness.

Confident of God’s love, we can be confident that he is guiding our personal relationships with people. Their approval means a lot less when we have God’s approval. 

Every time a performance version of some new car is unveiled, stories circulate about peculiar dealership visits. For example: A married couple visits the Porsche dealer for a Cayenne S, buys it, and drives it home. The next day, the husband takes it back, buys a Turbo S version in the same color, and asks the dealer to swap the badges so his wife will never know. Besides perpetuating unfair gender stereotypes, these stories – usually fake – accomplish the goal of demonstrating just how obsessed we are with trying to control what people think about us.